I Will See You All In Hell

I already wrote a thousand words or so that was just so depressing that I trashed it and decided to start over. But, I mean how else am I supposed to deal with Detroit Lions football, where one regime after another has ended in failure, including this one, and where there is no end in sight while the Nazi friendly Ford family keep their diseased name attached to the whole fucking thing.  It really is remarkable that a family that helped saved the world (some early questionable affections aside) could be this putrid, but here we are, in this fucked up Worst Case Scenario version of America where we have become the bad guys, the evil fucking empire that I guess we were always destined to be,

And anyway, I guess it is appropriate that these shithead Lions roll into Washington DC to pay fealty to the MAGA shitheads. The good news, I suppose, is that the Lions will probably beat these idiots, but is it the really good news is it just prolongs the inevitable collapse of this current regime, who have managed to do the unthinkable and be not only bad at football things like the Millen regime but also evil, with a probable rapist fat ass head coach and a sociopath Patriot Wayer fake tough guy who stalks the locker room with a baseball bat. It is all too much to take, and this is why a thousand words or so was already sacrificed to the hell mouth that is this shitty evil football team.

It’s just no goddamn fun when the team is bad and when you hate the assholes in charges so much that even winning wouldn’t be any fun because they’d still be there and the only way this cycle of endless misery ends is if we storm the whole fucking thing with torches and pitchforks, but we won’t because we are cowards who have deluded ourselves for far too long into believing that eating a perpetual shit sandwich somehow builds character. Yes, we are stronger in the broken places than most people are in the healthy places, but we shouldn’t have to be. It sucks, and it’s not right.

And yet, here we are, ready to watch these miserable assholes take on another team of miserable assholes owned by an almost unbelievably huge asshole with a racist ass team name that is embarrassing and shameful for an entire country of assholes who built their fortune on genocide and greed. Fuck it, take me out of this place, whisk me away to Mexico where I can die in peace beneath the ass of a hot Latina as her jealous narco boyfriend sets fire to my dick.

But I will never be so lucky, and I am doomed to sit here, a miserable 40 year old asshole and continue to watch the asshole football team that I have been chained to from birth through no fault of my own, although I guess at some point I should have the guts to pull the plug on the whole thing which just makes me a cowardly asshole, but you assholes wouldn’t let me, and so here I am again, writing about how it feels to be a Lions fan, and this is as much your fault as it as is mine and I will see you all in hell.

Still, at least we’ll have each other to keep company as we tell psychic horror stories and strangle each other in a shit heap of our own perpetual misery and this shit is even more depressing and awful than the thousand or so words I already wrote and scrapped, and you might ask why I am even doing this and the only thing I can tell you is that it is because you won’t let me go and so I can’t let you goo and we are doomed to just shit into each other’s mouths until the heat death of the universe.

So yeah, anyway, the Lions play the Redacteds today and I felt I had to fire something off to get you in the mood for another craptacular day of endless suffering and misery. lol man, you fuckers have dragged me to a dark place yet again and that’s fine, that’s fine, because I will just choke you all out here and you have to take it because that is the deal that we made. I write it, you read it and no one gets out alive, everybody dies.

So tell your friends to read my stuff because it doesn’t get any better than this and everyone likes to watch a car wreck in slow motion, the fucking ghouls, and I welcome every single one of them to this loathsome hate fest that never ends and won’t end until the Ford family relinquishes its evil hold on this franchise, which is the true Bobby Layne Curse here and man even that curse has gone past its supposed 50 year time limit, but there are no time limit draws here in this sport, no sir, only a permanent death match into the darkest parts of ourselves.

I should have just kept the original thousand or so words I had here but I didn’t and now you get this monstrosity, which is even darker than before, even more hate filled and miserable, but this is what you fuckers asked for and so this is what you get. I will see you all in hell.

Lions 24 Redacteds 14