8-8 last week, which is the sort of mediocrity we aspire to around here. I mean, at least this way no one dumb enough to use this is as Biblical wisdom lost a thumb or anything. I shouldn’t say “dumb enough” because fuck, who’s dumber, you for following this shit or me for writing it in the first place? We’re all fucking idiots here, but at least we do it with style and a sense of Spirit Warrior righteousness so that when the devil is putting the gun in our mouth, we can smile and tell him at least we had a good time. Anyway, let’s get to this week’s picks, ye damned sinners.
NY Giants (+3) at Washington
Ick. I hate the NFC East. I have long been on record as despising each and
every one of these mouth breathing asshole teams. From the players to the coaches
to the fans themselves – my god, these troglodyte fans – I can’t be bothered to
give a fuck about these wretched shitheads.
That really just serves as an extension of the markets they serve. That is Capitalist mud brain talk for “cities” and I hate myself for having just used it. But that’s what they are in the vast cosmology of American cultural hell. New York, Washington, Philly and Dallas. My God, you couldn’t come up with more rotten cities than these. Maybe Boston, but fuck. These four are enough. By the way, how the fuck did Dallas get in there? They are not in the east, and yet they have somehow come to embody the wretched soul of bankrupt Americanism better than any with their million gallon hats and jackass good ol’ boys, bur fuck, this is not about Dallas, it is about the Thursday night game between rivals of theirs, the Giants and whatever the fuck we’re calling Washington’s team.
Both of these teams stink, obviously, and yet the Giants probably stink a little bit more which is what happens when you trust your team to a quarterback from Duke which is the wrong sport to be cozying up to at Duke even if it is less odious than the Coach K led Aryan Nation Blue Devils and yes, Grant Hill, your soul is white and rotten. All hail Jalen Rose.
But yes, the Giants fucked up by rolling with a Duke quarterback, whose QB history is basically some chuds Steve Spurrier coached up for a season or two before fleeing back to Florida and now this dickless wonder, coached up by a dude who hitched his name to the Manning boys back in the day which makes him highly suspect both as a man and as a spirit entity.
But we all roll with what we got, and who am I to blame David Cutcliffe for taking credit for the Manning boys? We all have dark and depraved secrets buried, but at least this guy is upfront about it, I guess. But fuck him anyway, especially since when Michigan fired Brady Hoke and was just waiting on their Harbaugh who the NFL writers all said would never come because they are dumb pompous assholes, this fucker Cutcliffe convinced one of them that he TURNED DOWN the Michigan job which is just fucking absurd and speaks to his own carny depravity more than anything else and also the just dumb shit applesauced brain fucks who cover this witless sport.
Anyway, fuck both these teams, there are no winners here.
Pick: Washington
Cincinnati (+3) at Chicago
The Bengals and Joe Burrow continue to get little respect even after dropping Kirk Cousins and his damned Vikings. A Christian dolt should never be the leader of the Vikings but that has always kind of been their history except for when maybe Randy Moss was running wild, but even then. Why am I talking about the Vikings? Fuck this.
Anyway, the Bengals are better than what they are being given credit for, and a lot of that is because of Joe Burrow who doesn’t count as a successful Ohio St. quarterback since he had to flee to Baton Rouge and the coeds there in order to cleanse himself of that Buckeye stank. And yet, here he is, back in Ohio, but at least its in the south of Ohio which is half Kentucky in its DNA and as long as Burrow clings to that half of his nature, perhaps he and the Bengals have a real chance here.
The fucking Bears, meanwhile, are just gonna ruin their own Ohio quarterback, Justin Fields, who has too much of the Ohio in him and not enough of anything else, even if he did spend a year down in Georgia, but he was too weak for down there and had to transfer to a place of even more wretched morals and spiritless misery.
It is perhaps ironic that the non-Ohio QB in this game, the Chicago Bears QB, is the most ruined by the Ohio taint. But Joe Burrow somehow flies above all this, or perhaps below, getting dirty with Kentucky hill women now that he has had his fill of Baton Rouge’s best while Fields freezes up and panics as he looks from his penthouse in some Jordaneque hotel overlooking Lake Michigan and he realizes that there is nothing there for him but drowning in its vast emptiness, its ancient drowned caverns caring little for his baby humanity.
Pick: Bengals
Houston (+12.5) at Cleveland
It was as I suspected as the Browns looked like they belonged with the Chiefs until the Chiefs said fuck it and took the 4th quarter for the win. It is nothing to be ashamed about and shows that the Browns remain for real and solid contenders in the tough AFC North.
Of course, it also further cements Baker Mayfield as Kenny Stabler for these disgraced times. He can never be the original, but at least he represents an echo of a better time. He threw an interception to clinch the game for the Chiefs and then went in the locker room and told everyone to be critical of themselves but to stop hanging their heads like bitches and basically Spirit Warriored his team back into the right headspace.
Sadly, for the Texans, that means they are about to catch an ass whoopin’ courtesy of My Dude. They still don’t have a quarterback as Deshaun Watson remains in some dungeon somewhere where he can’t rape anyone but his own pathetic self, hands chafed and eyes swollen with tears and facializing himself.
I’m sorry, that’s a terrible image and to be honest I am a little worried about how sexualized I have let these things get, which is no doubt just a manifestation of my own frustrations as I round into my 40s and live a life of tragic despair. But you didn’t come here to hear about all that shit, so let’s just move on and accept that I am going to turn this thing into a sad degenerative waste mirroring my own personal decline.
And anyway, I am still in better shape than these sad ass Texans, drowning in the flood waters of Houston and also of life. And yet, they managed to whip up on the Jags last week, which just speaks to the Extra Dark world being created by Urban Meyer over there. Don’t get it twisted and think Houston is okay because they are not. They just aren’t lost in an utterly depraved wasteland like Jacksonville. I mean, Deshaun Watson for sure is, but the rest of this Texans teams is likely just ordinary sad instead of tragically ruined sad.
It all means that the Browns should roll, Dan will “accidentally” make a roster flub with Odell Beckham again in our fantasy league and life will continue on, floating down the Cuyahoga next to piles of burning trash.
Pick: Cleveland
Los Angeles Rams (-4) at Indianapolis Colts
Matthew Stafford seems to have been ordained by the media as the Man of The Season, which isn’t the same as MVP, but rather the dude people won’t shut the fuck up about, which is fine with me since if anyone deserves it after years of Long Suffering, it is Matty. But let’s not get twisted and pretend like no one ever had a bad word to say about him as we all bitched and moaned at points during his time with Detroit, but all in all, we kind of all came around to at least appreciate the dude and so we wish him well during his time in LA.
Of course, Los Angeles alone represents a potential Trap Game for the Soul, as Stafford’s aw shucks Texas geniality will be all too easy to be taken advantage of by Hollywood grifter types, getting him high in the hills and maybe taking pictures of his dick when he passes out to sell online or trade their way up in the human flesh game which dominate LA. It’s all house parties and “Good luck, pal” now but tomorrow it might be yacht parties with Arabs with No Names who just want to see if you’ll eat dog food for the right price.
On the other hand, Stafford is definitely a dude who knows how to live and play In The Fire, as a decade plus in Detroit is like playing for Hell, which is a city in Michigan, by the way, Hell, Michigan. Fitting.
The Colts, meanwhile, came up short in week one, which I predicted, as a QB room run by Carson Wentz with a frustrated Frank Reich wondering if he can fuck Jim Kelly’s wife looking on with despair. It isn’t really a good feel with the Colts, you know? I mean, it seems like it should be, but somehow they spiritually downgraded from Philip Rivers of all fucking people. That is alarming.
They have plenty of good, young weapons, like Nyheim Hines who isn’t even their starter at RB and yet might be their most important playmaker, which is why they just signed him to a big deal which is the sort of thing that can either solidify a dude or cause people to turn on him if he isn’t the messiah. It will be interesting to see which way this turns with the Colts.
But none of it will matter if Wentz is still Carson Wentz. The Colts might be better off with Reich suiting up, but maybe that is just me yearning for the dudes of my youth. Who’s to say? But it still seems to me like the Colts might be in trouble, especially because they are about to start 0-2. Thankfully, they play in the Asshole known as the AFC South, so they’ll probably be fine.
Pick: Rams
Buffalo (-3) at Miami
I should have known better than to trust the fucking Bills of all teams. Sure enough they fucked it up against the Steelers and have sort of fallen back in line spiritually speaking. It’s only 1 game into the season, though, so let’s not go panicking just yet or stabbing any waiters in the face, OJ.
Miami, on the other hand, managed to hold off the Patriots and their dipshit of a new QB, which is perhaps ominous for Little Bill and company but this is about the Dolphins so let’s not get carried away. Yet.
The Dolphins didn’t look that great or anything, but they seem capable, at least, of building on last season’s growth, which still might not be enough to take them over the top, but if the Bills stumble, and let’s face it, that is a definite possibility, the Dolphins are probably the most capable of slipping past them and stealing this relatively weak division.
But the Bills are probably going to rebound from last week since they have already tasted success with last season’s team, which is the sort of thing that can bolster a team when it gets down in later seasons. It might not be a great season for either of these teams, but in the AFC East that hardly seems to matter and one of them is likely headed for at least one home game in the playoffs.
Pick: Buffalo
New England (-5.5) at NY Jets
I fucking told you that Little Bill and Mac Jones are a doomed pairing, each needing the other to find validation, but neither is at the point in their career or lives that they can help the other out like that.
Little Bill, especially, continues to find himself staring in dull shock as somebody else fucks his wife, in this case, all of Tampa fucking Tom Brady. It just isn’t a good scene spiritually here and is unlikely to ever get better. The Patriots should have just kicked Belichick upstairs to a nice office and the ability to “advise” the Patriots as they start over with a hot young coach. But they didn’t and now you have a dude drifting into his senility years still with his hands at the wheel and that is a bad place to be.
Tom Brady, or even a faded copy of a copy of him, isn’t walking through that door, to paraphrase another desperate Boston goon in Rick Pitino, who, by the way, has a parade of aborted babies filling up dumpsters coast to coast. These dudes and this city are just enormous assholes.
But they are still better than the fucking Jets, who enter yet another period of rebuilding and despair and no wonder Joe Namath has to get drunk just to exist as a mascot of sorts for them. He just wants to get drunk and fuck sideline reporters, and hey, who among us, amirite? At least it’s better than caring about this team, which is the part that always gets lost in Namath’s infamous Suzy Kolber moment. “I don’t care if the team is strugg-a-ling” he lilted before going on to declare his desire to fuck her. Indeed.
Pick: New England
San Francisco (-3.5) at Philadelphia
The Eagles are indeed a rotten ass of a team, and it’s hard to see this going anywhere for them. I guess a rebuild is an order, but they are kind of doing a half ass one right now. They don’t seem to have an identity beyond the usual Philly bullshit, and this feels like the team and regime before the real team and regime, like fucking someone after a breakup and you both know it isn’t really going anywhere, you just need that separation from your ex, and after you fuck some randos maybe you’ll finally meet the right one, but not for years to come.
The 49ers, of course, are fresh off of the Opening Ceremonies of Detroit Drano Watch 2021, and could be okay this year, but I’m still not sure if it’s enough to compete in the Wild NFC West. And this whole thing with Jimmy G and Trey Lance is working out for now, but eventually that is gonna get uncomfortable and Jimmy G is gonna have to be traded.
He knows it, Lance knows, the 49ers know it. So how do you win when you know that your current starting QB is leveraged right out the door? It has to be a head trip for Jimmy G, to know that he is a dead man walking in San Francisco, but in an unusual twist, they might actually be a good team, which isn’t how these things normally play out.
It sort of reminds me of the Chargers situation when they drafted Philip Rivers after Eli Manning told them to go fuck themselves. But while they were busy with that drama, they overlooked the fact that they had Drew Brees starting at QB already. He did a year with the Chargers and then was traded so Rivers could get his spot. That’s the sort of thing Jimmy G is dealing with, but he’s probably no Drew Brees (bad for his career, maybe, but good for his soul) and who fucking knows who Trey Lance is? It’s possible the 49ers just fuck this whole thing up. But for now, they’re okay.
Pick: 49ers
Las Vegas (-5.5) at Pittsburgh
It’s probably a good thing this game isn’t in Las Vegas because Ben Roethlisberger would almost certainly rape one of the women, or many of the women, who is to say? But Roethlisberger does feel like the type to go to Vegas and engage in hedonism and end up in debt to the wrong people and he thinks he can get away with it because he’s famous and Big Ben and all that shit, but they dig holes in the desert just for loudmouth fucks like him, and that’s not really a good time.
The Raiders worked over the Ravens in a minor surprise, and now they have a chance to punch up the Steelers in what would be a great matchup if it were 1978. But it’s 2021 and the Oakland Raiders are now Las Vegas pets and the Steelers just won’t fucking let go of this thing, coming out on top over the Bills in one of the more disappointing games last week.
I guess the Steelers always have that run in them, innate to the franchise. Even when things seem to be headed for a cliff, the Steelers pull up and demoralize everyone. Maybe Roethlisberger gets handsy with some folks on the wagon train, I don’t know.
The game is in Pittsburgh, ground zero for Coal Nation (or Steel Nation, I guess is more accurate) which is a depressing place given that its entire identity has been shredded away through the years, leaving it as a meaningless city in a quickly darkening part of the world, that Appalachian belt of misery and despair.
A country away, the lights shine in the desert and water and electricity is consumed by gluttons from hell, trying desperately to steal some of that all but dead American Dream, just a tatter or two to get going. And back home in Pittsburgh, they just turn to Oxycontin and despair, knowing deep down that this world of theirs, this slice of Americana, is never, ever coming back.
The Steelers almost need to be good for these people or else it is storming the capital January 6 style and trucks full of Covid ravaged bodies who were easy pickings with all that opiate spike getting into themselves. It’s desperate times, baby, but ain’t that true about this whole fucking country? Yes, which is why the beloved Oakland Raiders are now the antiseptic Las Vegas Raiders and the Steelers just keep on living because if they die, a whole society goes with them.
Pick: Steelers
New Orleans (-3.5) at Carolina
This line seems a little small given what the Saints did to the Packers and the goddamn Devil last week. Sure, Carolina also won, but a win over the Jets barely counts and they are still rolling with the broken soul of Sam Darnold.
The Saints, meanwhile, have latched onto Jameis Winston in the wake of Drew Brees retiring to torture brown people and slide into my game experience like a fucking demon to try to sell me on some gambling adventure, but I’ve already got one, pal and this is it, you shit faced fuck.
Anyway, Winston is yet another dude who probably raped a lady back in the day, and also stole some crab legs, probably not on the same day, but then again, who is to say? Ruining a woman’s life almost certainly works up quite the appetite and so Jameis just grabbed those crab legs. I mean, why start respecting the social contract now?
It kind of sucks that New Orleans, perhaps the most Spirit Warrior city to ever exist, has to trot out yet another depraved degenerate. The last one was spiritually corrupt, an avatar for the White world, which as we all have come to see is a pretty fucked up world. And now Winston takes over, a man who will let Brees have his soul crime while he commits real street crime.
New Orleans deserves better than these assholes, but here we are, and people will just try to make their peace with it and cheer Jameis on in the Superdome because what the fuck else do they have to do but drown and die? Winston will break their hearts and betray them before it is over, but not yet, and certainly not against the hapless Panthers who are still a shitty team until a lot of things change or are proven Not Failed.
Pick: New Orleans
Denver (-6) at Jacksonville
lol one game in and it’s basically already over for Urban Meyer in Jacksonville. His players don’t respect him and he has apparently started to have violent outbursts, which isn’t surprising given that culture of mayhem and moral degradation has followed him wherever he has gone. I wrote extensively about it last week, but Urban has already fucked up too much to even be able to start conning the Khans. (nice pun)
He’s probably already working back channels to get the now open USC job, head back to college and fuck coeds again while his wife turns a blind eye to his madness. College is this predator’s natural habitat and he will almost certainly get back there as soon as he can, or as soon as a drug deal goes bad down in Florida.
I was kind of looking forward to Urban building his bullshit house of cards and then watching it all fall down on him, but the fucker isn’t even gonna get a chance to do that now. He’s already been exposed and the line has already been written on him, and all that’s left for him to do is resign disgracefully and then hook up with OJ to bring USC back to glory.
I don’t even really know nor care what is going on with the Broncos, who couldn’t snag Aaron Rodgers which would have made them an instant contender. But no, now they are just saddled with the same team that’s been stumbling around the last few seasons, missing a quarterback who can pull it all together. But like I said, I don’t really know what’s going with them and I don’t care. And yet, they will still beat this pathetic Jacksonville team. Of that, I am reasonably sure.
Pick: Denver
Minnesota (+4.5) at Arizona
It is all but over for Kirk Cousins and my god I can hear the bells ringing already. This shameful fucker is a classic Southwest Michigan whack job, the mega-Christian kind of thing where it’s all a big money con. It’s the same environment that produced Betsy DeVos and her brother, Erik Prince, that fucker who runs what used to be known as Blackwater, which is the outsourced future of warfare and anything that requires a flying below the Constitution mercenary army.
Cousins might as well just hook up with those assholes now, make it complete, forget about this NFL thing and ascend to new realms of Evil.
Kyler Murray balled out for Arizona and for me in my aforementioned fantasy league, and I am now riding in first place after only one week, just like the Cardinals. And like the Cardinals I am almost sure to fuck it all up and end up swimming furiously in the middle just to try to get back to the surface, but that is life in the Poet Warrior fantasy leagues and also in the hellstorm that is the NFC West.
The Cardinals are probably running last or maybe 3rd in terms of buzz, but if Russell Wilson and the Seahawks turn poison and the 49ers fuck up their quarterback situation, suddenly second place behind the Rams seems tenable for the Cardinals. Hell, they might be talented enough to get there even if all the above doesn’t happen. Kyler Murray is just a special dude, the sort of dude who can help a team break through to the next level. Erasing the Vikings and Cousins this week would be a nice second step.
Pick: Cardinals
Atlanta (+12.5) at Tampa Bay
There are places, deep in the Amazon that have never been visited by man. Same with the deepest jungles of Africa. Scientists believe that there are countless species we’ve yet to encounter and potent plants which can be synthesized into modern medicines. But they’re already too late because Tom Brady has already gotten into all those places and sucked them dry, literally picking up fragile wildlife and sucking them like clams.
Meanwhile, Giselle remains behind at The Compound, overseeing Uncle Klaus’ genetic “experiments” on Maid #7 who Gisele bought special in Thailand while Tom “cleansed” the girls working the streets. This one was expensive compared to the ones she just selects out of cages at the local ICE facility. But none of those subjects worked out. She can still smell their flesh cooking, the sizzle snapping in her ears, Uncle Klaus swearing in German and demanding fresh flesh while the mute Haitian boy mops the remnants of the “help” out of his lab. Hopefully she won’t have to go trawling the Make-A-Wish kids for fresh subjects.
All that goes on in the world of Tom Brady and it somehow allows him to live eternal, never aging, never faltering, winning and winning and winning until he is virtually synonymous with the word. Brady is a disgusting monster of a man and he is also the NFL’s greatest Leviathan, and the two images combined make for the 21st century’s perfect Fascist Icon.
But there is still some of the Michigan Man in Brady’s cocktail of Immortal Demigod juice. And I like to believe it is that proud, passionate dude who brings Brady to glory again and again, the man who was Charles Woodson’s teammate, the man who cold iced Alabama in the Orange Bowl. These are all part of Brady’s legacy, but they are the foundational parts and that is why I can’t let go of this dude even though the rest of the world hates him. I was there before he was TOM BRADY, when he was just Tom Brady, college dude looking to go on to bigger and better things. And so he did.
The Falcons know this all too well, victims of Brady coming back to destroy their spirit in the Super Bowl and essentially wreck their franchise. The Falcons are still trying, but it is just sad now. Brady broke them spiritually and their only chance is a scrubbing, but they are determined to ride out the Matt Ryan years as he sinks further and further into a prone position like a fucking Gollum like creature before the King with all the Rings.
Brady owns these dudes, just like he owns so many others. And just like he owns a special “school” for troubled kids and immigrants.
Pick: Tampa Bay
Dallas (+3) at LA Chargers
Jerry Jones surprisingly came out as a champion of getting vaccinated. I say “surprisingly” since he belongs to that fucked up tribe of MAGA fascist lizard people who have gone completely fucking insane and will fight you to the death over every fucking thing that happens, whether it’s getting a needle in the arm or not coughing in the faces of babies.
But, no. Jerry Jones told everyone to get vaccinated or go to hell, but I think it’s probably because he’s a germaphobe and doesn’t want your common man cooties. It isn’t really social growth so much as a frightened old man who probably burns his staff in a crematorium and replaces them with fresh new hangers-on and ruined souls every night and morning. Jerry just doesn’t want to catch your redneck AIDS and there is a 98% chance he and Joe Rogan will beat up a Chinese dude just for being alive in these horrible times.
And while Jerry is busy looking for Patient 0, his football team continues to unravel and yet another era of Cowboys football is about to pass without anything to show for it. Tony Romo hangs his head and weeps in recognition of what Dak Prescott is going through. It’s been more than a quarter century since the Cowboys owned the NFL which is their brand basically. Jimmy Johnson and Barry Switzer helped their old Arkansas buddy out, but once they were gone and it was just Jerry Jones and his own “genius”, the whole thing turned to shit and has been there ever since.
Tom Landry was a dour old asshole, but at least he is the real thing. Jerry Jones is just some rich carny who wanted to go to NFL Fantasy Camp and used every asset available to make it happen. But all those old relationships wear thin, and Jerry Jones for the last quarter century has just flailed uselessly against the rising tide of his own incompetence. Tom Landry won all those Super Bowls in the 70s because like Jimmy Johnson and Barry Switzer he was a football coach. Jerry Jones is an old coke addict. He is not competent in footballing.
The Chargers remain bastard children of LA, and the parents don’t really want them. But here they are, and they aren’t going away and so LA is gonna have to start buying them shoes and school supplies and whatnot. It is a sad thing, and yet, the Chargers are still in a better place spiritually than the Cowboys, who are wretched and depraved and have started to teeter on the brink of irrelevance. Jerry Jones, you will never ever win it all again.
Pick: Chargers
Tennessee (+5.5) at Seattle
I was kinda surprised that Tennessee wasn’t any good week one since I figured they’d win the AFC South. They still might. I mean, it’s just them and the Colts while Houston deals with rapes and floods and Jacksonville deals with the Urban Meyer of it all. But the Titans are likely to start 0-2 and maybe the AFC South is challenging the NFC East for worst division, but shit, someone has to win it.
I suspect it will be Tennessee just because those people are entrenched down there, bathing in the fake country livin’. Nathan Bedford Forrest cosplay abounds and everyone is making America great again.
The opposite of that can be seen in Seattle where activists fight a perpetual street war against cops and Jeff Bezos. It is a city that prides itself on its progressive woke ass culture, and that is good, but only to an extent. Eventually, you just end up a caricature of yourself and the message gets warped and broken until no one can really say what it is anymore and people just stop caring. It is shitty, but that is how it goes. But Seattle, maybe more than anywhere else in this fucked up country, won’t let go of the fight, and at a certain point it evolves and it just becomes a rage against everything and this is what our side of the culture civil war looks like when it gets all riled up.
Seattle anarchists vs Tennessee Proud Boys for the soul of America is a dangerous battle being played out every day in a million different ways, both in real life and online. Football is supposed to be a break from all that, but everything bleeds into everything and at some point you have to realize that Seattle fans are probably better people than Tennessee fans. Of course, everyone is fucking awful everywhere, but as an aggregate culture, the Seattle people throwing rocks at cops are probably better than the Tennessee Proud Boys dreaming of the white sheets of yesteryear.
Also, Russell Wilson is better than any of Tennessee’s players.
Pick: Seattle
Kansas City (-3.5) at Baltimore
The Ravens are *this* close to starting 0-2, which is not a good way to get things going. But the Chiefs look like they can be had this season, and maybe Baker Mayfield meets them again and this time finishes the job. But maybe that is all about the Browns and Kansas City will go back to rolling everyone else.
But the Ravens whole culture is predicated on rolling people, but they aren’t gonna roll the Chiefs, right? But it’s possible that the Ravens catch the Chiefs loafing a bit here, and Baltimore should be hungrier, but that doesn’t always mean anything. That’s because the Chiefs have been in so many situations now over the past couple of years that they have the ability to grab hold of any game they are playing and take control. It’s a hard trick and only elite teams who win year in and year out can pull it off.
But Baltimore needs this win, and since it is in front of their people and not the horrid rednecks of Kansas/Missouri, I think they have a real shot at dropping the Chiefs, muddying up the picture for everyone. If they fail? Well, the Ravens always seem to manage to pop up down the line safe and sound so maybe this isn’t as critical as I have talked it up as, but still, 0-2 is not a good place to come back from. It’s a long season, getting longer every year, and yet 0-2 is an ugly tell that usually means you’re gonna need to rethink some things going into next season, or maybe that extra week somehow changes things and teams can fuck around and go 0-2 and not give a fuck. But still, I would much rather win, wouldn’t you?
Pick: Ravens
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